


feel me

by darlingachingbones



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fluff, Gen, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Not Beta Read, Post-Book 1: Carry On, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:27:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24529123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darlingachingbones/pseuds/darlingachingbones
Summary: When the Mage had first come to take Simon away, he had explained magick as a feeling. “It’s a power yes, Simon, of course, it’s a power but above all it is a feeling.” He had said as he held the eleven-year-old’s hand and walked him to a sleek black car.Simon didn’t understand nor did he dare ask what the Mage had meant, and only gave a silent nod in response.He tried to shake off the choking feeling he got when looking at the Mage for too long.~~Simon can feel others' magic, all the time.
Relationships: Penelope Bunce & Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch & Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Comments: 2
Kudos: 51





	feel me

When the Mage had first come to take Simon away, he had explained magick as a feeling. “It’s a power yes, Simon, of course, it’s a power but above all, it is a feeling.” He had said as he held the eleven-year-old’s hand and walked him to a sleek black car.

Simon didn’t understand nor did he dare ask what the Mage had meant, and only gave a silent nod in response. 

He tried to shake off the choking feeling he got when looking at the Mage for too long.  
-  
When Simon entered his dormitory for the first time, he understood. A surge of heat surrounded him, coming from the source of some boy who was spinning around and holding a cat in the air. 

“Baz give it back!” A little girl begged. The boy sneered and dropped it, pushing back his black hair and looking at Simon.

“You’re Simon snow, the Mage's heir,” he grinned and straightened his vest. “I’m Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch.” Simon watched the girl run after the cat and out the door.

Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch stuck out a hand and tapped his foot impatiently. “You can call me Baz.”

Simon glared at his pale, thin hand and asked: “What did you think you were doing with her cat?”  
-  
Simon understood again when the red-haired girl sat down next to him. 

She helped him bring his bloody coin to life and she was confident and she didn’t even need a wand.

“How did you do that?” He asked, hoping he didn’t sound dumb.

“You don’t do magic,” he glanced at the green shield on her jumper. She was a first-year, like him. “You are magic.” 

He watched the coin ladybird scuttle about a bit more. “I’m Simon Snow,” he mumbled.

“I know. Penelope Bunce.”  
-  
Penelope’s magic was Simon’s favorite by far. Agatha’s was too harsh and Baz’s wanted to kill him but Penny’s was just right.

He tried to explain it to her once. 

“Simon, we’ve never... Shared magic. How could you know what mine feels like?” She asked him, sipping her tea. Tea time was his favorite, the scones were to die for and he got to see Penny.

“But the Mage said it was a feeling-” he tried and she snorted. 

“Merlin Simon, who knows what that man is trying to tell you, but I have no idea how you could feel my magic because I’ve never given it to you.”  
-  
When he spoke to the Mage about it, he asked Simon a bunch of questions and smiled a little too much. Simon was shoved out of his office after an hour, left with more questions than he had in the start.

The choking feeling disappeared the moment Simon left. It took him a moment to realise that was the Mage’s magic.  
-  
When he met the Humdrum for the first time, he started to understand. The humdrum was him, bouncing a little red ball, dressed in his ratty first-year clothes. 

The humdrum absorbed magic, Simon felt it. 

When he left Watford for the summer he sobbed into his knees until there were no tears left.  
-  
That was all years ago, and Simon can’t feel magic anymore. When he lost his, it was the first thing he noticed. 

“I’m fucking empty without it, Penny,” he cries out one afternoon. 

“Without what? Your magic?”

“No, the werewolves. Of course my bloody magic.” He snaps. Penny looks like she’s ready to slap him so he pauses before continuing. “Magic was hard and stressful, but it was me. And I felt it. When I lost it, I couldn’t feel Baz’s fire or your- yours and I’m wi-without this whole part of m-me and how do-”

Penny’s hands are on his face and he stops. “You feel this, Simon? I’m warm, right?” She asks calmly. He nods slowly and she smiles. “It’s not magic, but it’s something, yeah? And Simon, you have it too. It’s the next best thing, you’re warm. You’re love.”

“I’m love?” He asks. She takes his hands and makes him hold his face too. “Whenever you feel empty, just tell me. Because Simon,” she pushes a bit of magic out, “this is love.” 

He nods again, more furiously.  
-  
He tells Baz about it the next night, their arms around each other and his face buried in the vampire’s hair.

“You could feel magick,” Baz repeats incredulously. 

“Cool, huh?”

“You could feel mine?”

“It was fucking fire Baz, of course, I felt it.”

“Yours was all-consuming,” Baz mumbles into his boyfriend’s chest.

Simon rolls his eyes, “Your ego is all-consuming,” he mumbles.

“So Penny gave you a bit of her magic?” He asked.

“Yeah, it was nice, I.. I missed it a bit.”

“What if I gave you some of mine?”

Simon kisses his forehead and nods. It surges through them both and he feels his fingers curl and the hair on the back of his neck stand up. 

Baz’s magic, Simon decides, is a close tie to Penny’s.


End file.
